I am what one would call a "fixer." No, I am not a mechanic, handyman, carpenter, etc... I am however that person, who if senses the slightest bit that her world may be off kilter wants to correct it right away.
I have many life stories, but I will share just one....
My husband; a good man. He volunteers his free time helping others. He is a Volunteer Fireman, but not only that he helps neighbors, friends, and family at the drop of a hat. He has been a member of his local Vol. Fire Company for 15 years, officially. Unofficially, he has grown up w/ these members. He recently made the decision to leave town for his job.....
September 7, 2011 it rained so hard that our area was flooded. Joe worked his day job all the way through and then he received the news that they were packing up and leaving town. September 10th and 11th he was able to stay home w/ his family. He made a clear, cut choice to CHOOSE his family because he knew he was leaving his 2 young sons and his wife, indefinitely. I think it is the 1st time in his life that he chose loved ones over his need to help others. We needed him more emotionally than our neighbors needed him pumping their basements.
September 11, 2011.... He leaves. The days leading up to this one were harder on myself than the boys or my husband. I could cry at the drop of a hat. It was a laughing cry because I was embarrassed that I was being so emotional. I was angry with myself. The boys and myself walked Daddy out to his truck, each shared a hug, and a tearful goodbye. It may seem silly, but this was the first time he has left for any long period of time so if it is silly, so be it. My husband is not an emotional guy. He is a tough, rough, hard working, MAN! To be honest, I have seen my husband cry 4 times in the 17 years that I have known him.
1. Saying Goodbye, as he left me to go to Texas for a year. (Pre-family)
2. Our Wedding Day
3. The birth of our children
4. The death of his Grandparents
...and now I was adding a #5 to the list. My husband cried. He had tears streaming down his face as he was hugging his boys goodbye. It was the saddest event I have experienced.
Fast forwarding to present time. Joe is still working out of town. He is still missing the boys and his wife. He now has to add another thing to his list of sacrifices; The Fire Company.
Going from white to black:
Though, this decision was his 100% and it was an upstanding, mature thing to do, it was still hard. It was hurtful to know that people who he calls "brothers" would discuss his dedication to the very place that he has always put first. I never understood why these people could never separate friendship from fire station. I just do not understand that, but I am just the wife.
(December 25, 2001: A boy proposes to a girl. Boy pager goes off. Boy leaves his now fiance to go clean a chimney.)
It has been months of my husband hearing slights and slanders about him being out of town. And though he would never question any of it; I would. I know when something bothers somebody and I want to make it better.
I decided enough was enough. I stopped at the station and visited w/ the source. I should have done it months ago, but I stayed out of it for as long as I could. The source was nice about it, but honest. I didn't like what he had to say, but he was honest. It all comes down to business vs. personal and anything that was said was NOT personal, it was business. That is the part I will never understand. If these "brothers" knew how to be friends, they would have understood my husband's choice to spend his last 2 days in town w/ his boys.
BUT in my mind, I fixed the problem. I went to the source, I of course cried because I am a baby. I hate that about myself. I cry when I am mad or sad.... it's a quality that I do not enjoy. ...and now the source has some more ammunition when busting on me. He told me I do not need to protect my husband, but he knows that I always will.
My husband stepped down from his Assistant Chief position and joined the black hats again. I am proud of him whether he is wearing white or black because he is a dedicated volunteer and one you all should be lucky to have in your Company.
And as the source likes to tell me....
"He knows that I wear the pants in the relationship..... " ...and to that I will just have to laugh!! :)
